By Your Side: Divorce Law and Support

What Happens to the House? Understanding Property, Debt, and Divorce

Episode Summary:In this episode, Patricia dives deep into one of the most emotional and complicated issues in divorce—what happens to the house. She breaks down how property is divided, what “marital assets” really mean under New York law, and how debt, pensions, and other finances come into play. Beyond the numbers, Patricia explains the emotional ties many women have to their homes, why financial planning is key before filing for divorce, and how to make confident decisions about the future. She also explores how housing decisions affect children and introduces the concept of “nesting” as a creative solution for families who can make it work.
What You Will Learn in This Episode:
How marital property and debt are divided under New York law
Why emotional attachment to the marital home can cloud judgment
Steps to take before divorce to protect your financial stability
How pensions and 401(k)s are split—and what mistakes to avoid
The importance of financial planning and divorce coaching
How to prioritize your goals and make strategic trade-offs during negotiations
The impact of housing decisions on children and how “nesting” works
Key Timestamps: 00:00 – Introduction: What happens to your house in a divorce 01:45 – Understanding marital property and a 50/50 split 04:30 – The financial reality of keeping the marital home 06:15 – Dividing pensions, savings, and retirement accounts 08:00 – The truth about debt division and financial responsibility 10:30 – Why planning before divorce can prevent emotional overwhelm 13:45 – Setting financial goals and understanding trade-offs 16:30 – The emotional side of losing a home and finding peace afterward 18:00 – Housing and custody: how to keep children’s stability in mind 20:30 – The “nesting” arrangement and how it benefits kids 22:00 – Closing thoughts and where to get support
About the Show:
By Your Side: Divorce Law and Support is a podcast for women navigating the uncertainty of divorce. Hosted by Patricia Sokolich, a family law attorney with more than 30 years of experience and a certified divorce coach, the show blends legal insight with compassionate guidance. Each episode offers practical tools on financial preparation, custody considerations, and choosing the right attorney—while also addressing the emotional challenges of leaving a marriage. Whether you’re just beginning to wonder if divorce is right for you, preparing for mediation, or rebuilding afterward, this show provides clarity, confidence, and support every step of the way.

How to Leave an Abusive Relationship, Even If You Don’t Have Money

Episode Summary:In this powerful episode, Patricia Sokolich dives into one of the most difficult but necessary conversations — how to leave an abusive relationship when finances feel like a barrier. She breaks down the three types of abuse — physical, emotional, and financial — and explains how control and fear keep many women trapped. Patricia shares practical steps women can take to regain their independence, protect their children, and find safety, even when financial limitations make leaving seem impossible.
What You Will Learn in This Episode:
The three main types of abuse and how to identify them
Signs of financial control and how it traps victims
Realistic steps for leaving when money feels like a barrier
How to seek legal protection and support safely
The role of divorce coaching in planning a safe and structured exit
Emotional and community resources available to survivors
Key Timestamps: 00:00 – Introduction to the topic and why many women stay in abusive relationships 02:45 – Understanding the three main forms of abuse: physical, emotional, and financial 05:10 – Signs of financial control and what financial abuse looks like in a marriage 08:40 – What to do if you can’t afford to leave and how to start saving safely 10:30 – When and how to seek shelter or police support 13:00 – How divorce coaching helps women plan a safe exit 15:40 – The importance of emotional support and breaking the cycle of abuse 18:50 – Resources and legal steps women can take without hiring a lawyer 20:10 – Words of encouragement: why you should never give up
About the Show:
By Your Side: Divorce Law and Support is a podcast for women navigating the uncertainty of divorce. Hosted by Patricia Sokolich, a family law attorney with more than 30 years of experience and a certified divorce coach, the show blends legal insight with compassionate guidance. Each episode offers practical tools on financial preparation, custody considerations, and choosing the right attorney—while also addressing the emotional challenges of leaving a marriage. Whether you’re just beginning to wonder if divorce is right for you, preparing for mediation, or rebuilding afterward, this show provides clarity, confidence, and support every step of the way.
 
If you or someone you know is in danger, contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 800-799-7233 or text BEGIN to 88788 for confidential support.

I Want to File for Divorce. Where Do I Start?

Episode Summary:
In this episode, longtime family law attorney and divorce coach Patricia Sokolich walks women through the very first steps of divorce. From recognizing the signs it may be time to leave, to gathering the right financial documents, to understanding mediation and custody evaluations, Patricia explains how proper preparation can make all the difference. She shares practical advice for women who feel ready to move forward but don’t know where or how to begin.
Key Timestamps:
01:40 – Signs it may be time to consider divorce04:30 – Why you shouldn’t rush to hire a lawyer immediately06:15 – The financial documents every woman should gather09:50 – How a divorce coach helps you prepare for custody evaluations12:30 – Mediation: benefits, risks, and what to know before agreeing16:00 – Finding the right attorney and knowing your end goals
About the Show:
By Your Side: Divorce Law and Support is a podcast for women navigating the uncertainty of divorce. Hosted by Patricia Sokolich, a family law attorney with more than 30 years of experience and a certified divorce coach, the show blends legal insight with compassionate guidance. Each episode offers practical tools on financial preparation, custody considerations, and choosing the right attorney—while also addressing the emotional challenges of leaving a marriage. Whether you’re just beginning to wonder if divorce is right for you, preparing for mediation, or rebuilding afterward, this show provides clarity, confidence, and support every step of the way.

What Is a Divorce Coach and How Can One Help?

Episode Summary:
In this episode, family law attorney Patricia Sokolich shares insights from over 30 years of experience helping women navigate the challenges of divorce. Now offering private divorce coaching, she explains how coaching provides clarity, emotional support, and practical preparation before hiring an attorney. Patricia discusses the misconceptions about divorce, the importance of financial awareness, the role of domestic control in relationships, and how women can gain confidence and control through guided support.
Key Timestamps:
00:45 – What is a divorce coach and how can they help?02:20 – Why Patricia transitioned from courtroom law to coaching04:30 – Misconceptions about divorce and relying on friends’ experiences07:15 – Managing expectations and the role of coaching in preparation09:40 – Listening, empathy, and when to seek professional therapy12:00 – Financial preparation and the “pre-divorce prep period”15:10 – Addressing domestic control and ensuring safety before divorce17:50 – Patricia’s experience supporting survivors of abuse19:30 – Advice for women who feel stuck or scared before taking the next step
About the Show:
By Your Side: Divorce Law and Support is a podcast for women navigating the uncertainty of divorce. Hosted by Patricia Sokolich, a family law attorney with more than 30 years of experience and a certified divorce coach, the show blends legal insight with compassionate guidance. Each episode offers practical tools on financial preparation, custody considerations, and choosing the right attorney—while also addressing the emotional challenges of leaving a marriage. Whether you’re just beginning to wonder if divorce is right for you, preparing for mediation, or rebuilding afterward, this show provides clarity, confidence, and support every step of the way.